I'm sitting in my bed at 2 am, and I don't feel like sleeping. I'm not anxious or worried, but rather I have a peace like I have never experienced before.
My room is a mess, I have a sick stomach, an unfinished list, and I’ve eaten little besides fried foods, tortillas and spoonfuls of peanut butter.
But I’m finding a peace that isn't dependent on those things. Its a peace that only comes from Christ and it floods over my imperfections.
In three days I will leave this orphanage and the 8 hard, broken hearts I have poured out to. There has been no magical moment of lives being changed. These girls are still hurting, they are still dealing with their pain and they are still hardened.
Outside of the orphanage, there are still people hungry and walking the streets. As I lay awake tonight— children are laying on dirt floors and prostitutes walk the streets because they don't know how else to support their children.
I have spent the past weeks battling being overcome by all this pain. How could I ever leave when there is still so much work to be done?
But then I realized that I could live here forever and serve with all I have in me..and guess what? There would still be poverty.
But I'm learning that my goal really isn't to end poverty, but rather to hand a meal to one hungry child.
My goal isn't to save every woman from prostitution or eradicate AIDS, but rather to love on just one.
My goal isn't to restore every orphan, but rather to remind 8 girls of the love and grace their creator lavishes on them.
Just like there will always be crime, pain, and poverty in Memphis— there will always be a divide between the rich and the poor, there will always be hungry children, prostitutes, and orphans in Honduras.
Instead of spending my days asking “why”, maybe I am going to start asking a different question.
How can I help that one person?
How can I live with less so that others can have more?
How can I open my eyes to see the forgotten wherever the Lord places me— no matter what continent, country, city or zip code?
Because there is poverty everywhere, we just have to look up long enough to see a need.